(Written in a different Journal on 2/7.)
Life gets to be too much and I push the girl into the corner. “I can’t deal with you right now.”
This journal which sits here abandoned. Long gone are the days of herbal supplements. I’ve been off and on the patch multiple times, usually due to money. Can’t tell you the last time I wore something girly under my boy clothes, panties tucked away god knows where. Life grabs the boy by the balls and he turns his back on the girl.
I think about her. I ache at times for her, but feeling helpless about it all, it’s easier to ignore and push away than to do anything.
And then I open a paper journal to express some private thoughts and it all comes flooding out. There she sits, buried beneath stress and worry and money and appearances, floundering, sobbing beneath the boy’s attempts to hold onto it all for dear life, to keep his head afloat. Hurt, waiting, hoping for even just a few hours of her, a woman.
She knows not where to turn or what to do.
She is the lost girley.
February 17, 2011 at 8:51 pm |
It must be so hard to be torn between two worlds. I hope you find your peace soon.